The holidays are almost here. Unless you’re living under a rock, they began right before Halloween. Some of you might dread THE HOLIDAYS and others of you only semi-dread it. Is there anyone out there over the age of 20 who loves THE HOLIDAYS? Just curious.
I fall somewhere in the middle. To me, THE HOLIDAYS can be an awkward revisit of forced expectations that if truly explored, might not even be necessary. It’s also a time I feel a pang in my chest for those who dread the holidays, can’t afford the holidays, or simply can’t be with the loved ones they actually want to be with.
Then comes the shopping.
There’s the mall parking garage:
To the person in the parking garage who sits and waits with your blinker on: Waiting for that parking spot while backing up traffic over three levels is unwarranted. No one wants to watch Mom, Grandma, Grandpa, a small infant, a toddler, (and some other unknown person who’s just hanging around, disinterested) load 100 years worth of shopping into one vehicle for 30 minutes. It’s unnecessary. Because you’ll just get out of the car and walk 10 miles throughout the mall, anyway.
There’s also the shopping: struggling to find something for that person who buys everything they want and need when you’re faint from hunger and your shoes are about ready to give out.
But remember, the person alone in a nursing home, assisted living facility, or someone who’s ostracized for a made-up reason no one remembers can also use a smile.
Kids are especially important. It’s the glorious time of Baby Jesus, then there’s also the kid who THINKS he/she is Baby Jesus. Shopping, yelling, and pulling hair over of-the-moment dolls and toys is just part of the fun we call Christmas in the great U.S. of A.
So, in order to lighten the mood and/or add to your currently happy mood, I write a letter each year to each member of my Master List of People I send Christmas Cards To (which changes every year, and sometimes gets, well, smaller).
It’s a spoof on those glorious, wonderful, and annoying form letters we all get from someone each year. There’s pictures from Helsinki, baby’s first footprint, a cat with antlers, and there’s always someone who just graduated with their third doctorate.
Sure, I understand why they’re created. It’s easy to write one letter and send it to everyone once per year. It’s a burden the USPS bears that until now hasn’t been exposed for what it really is: A easy way to
brag gloat annoy catch up with everyone from your sixth distant cousin to your favorite dentist.
In this next post, I’ll be offering some tips and guidelines to find that perfect balance between arrogance and information.
In a form letter.
Coming soon! Sometime before Christmas, 2012.
PEACE TO ALL THIS HOLIDAY SEASON.